Where's Lee
by budd-tase08
Summary: Lee learns the hard way that pissing off Neji and Tenten is a bad thing. The story also has a birthday party for Naruto with all of the teams. Please read and review, constructive comments welcome!


**Where's Lee?**

It all started at the end of training, when Guy sensei was giving his usual lecture on the power of youth. Lee was very attentive, as usual, while Neji and Tenten stared at the  
trees, day dreaming. "Remember team, the hidden lotus blooms twice and don't mess up your hair." Guy sensei laid it on a little too thick with the "don't mess up your hair" part. When he finally stopped he reminded them to meet at the Ichiraku Ramen shop for Naruto's birthday party. "See ya around eight." Guy yelled as he vanished.

Somewhere around the leaf village...

Lee continually rambled on about the power of youth. It was youth this and youth that and it was pissing Neji and Tenten off. So they started their own conversation. "So what are you getting Naruto for his birthday?" Tenten asked Neji. "I don't know, I heard all he eats is ramen, so maybe I'll just buy him a case of instant ramen or something," Neji responded, "What about you?" "Well, I bet he needs some new ninja tools and after all I am a weapons specialist," Tenten responded back. "And that's how you become 100 youthful, Lee said. He then changed his subject. "So what are you guys getting Naruto for his birthday?" They sighed and repeated what they just told each other. "I know a poem! I will write him a poem on youthful paper and maybe a youth..." "Dammit Lee! Shut the hell up with this youthful crap!" Neji yelled interupting Lee. "Now, now Neji, it's not very youthful to swear," Lee said cooly. "Oh yeah, fu..." "Neji, let me handle this," Tenten offered. She reached into her pocket, taking out a picture of her and the other girls in bikinis. It had no effect on him. "Tenten, gawking at half-naked girls is also very unyouthful," Lee said sternly, "Well I am off to get some nice colorful paper, Bye!" Lee ran off yelling. "Good ridence," Neji sighed in relief, "He was really starting to piss me off!" "Well, I better go buy Naruto's birthday gift, Bye Neji," Tenten said. "Bye, I will see you later," Neji said as he headed off to the market to buy some ramen.

At Lee's house...

"Okay, I'm finished." Lee folded up the bright blue paper with an assortment of colorful flowers. He looked up and stumbled on a few pictures of him in a cheerleader costume from Halloween last year. He neatly put it in the envelope and said to himself, "A reminder of youth is more precious than money." He looked at the time. "Well, I had better go and meet Neji and Tenten at the training field." He said to himself as he ran off.

At the training field...

"Where's Lee?" Tenten asked. "Who cares," Neji said coldly, "I swear if he mentions youth one more time I'll kill him!" "I can agree with you on that," Tenten added. "Neji, Tenten," Lee shouted. Neji and Tenten groaned. "Come on, it's very unyouthful to be late." Neji and Tenten instantly jumped the second he said "youth." Neji and Tenten angrily stomped towards lee grabbing a chakra string and a phone (yes, out of thin air--don't ask me how!) "Hey, what are you guys doing!?" Then Lee screamed in a shrill, girly scream.

At Naruto's birthday party...

"He-here, have this Naruto-kun," Hinata stammered giving him some ointment. "Gee thanks, Hinata," Naruto yelled, "I am running out from the last one you gave me." "Yo, Naruto," Kiba greeted, "I got you, your own ninja dog." This dog was one of Kakashis' named Pakkun. "Pakkun!" Naruto yelled. "Hey, for the last time I am not a stray," Pakkun hissed at Kiba. "I belong to Kakashi Hatake." "Aw, who's a fiesty dog," Kiba said babying Pakkun, "Who want's a bone?" As he patted the dog on the head. "Don't mind Kiba," Shino said, "He thinks he's the only one who can understand him. Anyways, I put some of my insects in a ant farm for you. Use them wisely." Shino handed Naruto the ant farm. "Uh, thanks," "Ah, he vanished, and he left a keychain..." Kiba said, "...Um here." Kiba threw him the keychain and ran off.

The next group was Asuma's team. Strangely Choji was on a leash that Asuma was holding. In the other hand he had an awesome birthday cake. Shikamaru and Ino were there and Ino was carrying a bright bouquet of flowers. "Happy birthday Naruto!" they all said except for Choji, who was straining against the leash and muttering, "Cake, cake, CAKE!" Ino handed him the cake and flowers, "I baked the cake and supplied the flowers, but it's from everyone," she bragged. "Uh, why is Choji on a leash?" Naruto asked. "Oh, that was to prevent him from attacking Asuma and eating the cake," Shikamaru answered. "Okay, well thanks for the cake and the flowers," Naruto said. "Enjoy the party!" Kakashi and Guy then appeared after Asuma's team left. "Sorry were late, I just got a present for you in the mail from Sasuke," said Kakashi as he held out the present. Naruto beamed. "Sasuke, gimme!" Naruto opened the present. "It's a alarm clock, that Sasuke, he is my best friend and I'll try even harder to bring him back." "Naruto!" Kakashi yelled as he grabbed the alarm clock (which was actually a bomb) and hurled it away from them. It exploded and shocked everyone around it. Kakashi scratched the back of his head and said "oops, forgot one." "Hmn, no wonder why the card says "DIE NARUTO!" Naruto said. "You also got a present from Mizuki, The Akatskis, and Orochimaru," Kakashi added. "And here," Kakashi said as he handed him a mask exactly like his." "Awesome!" Naruto yelled. "And remember that suit I gave you before you went to look for the fifth Hokage," Guy reminded, "Well, you left it and I never had a more perfect chance then now, so here." Guy handed Naruto the suit. "Sweet, I'll go put it on right now!" Naruto said. Everyone except Guy groaned. Even Sakura said, "Great, like we need another Lee around."

Neji and Tenten finally arrived. "Hey guys." They were covered with dirt and the presents they had looked like they had been dragged through the mud. "Happy birhtday Naruto," Tenten said giving Naruto her present. "Wow, heat seeking kunais, thanks Tenten," Naruto said. "And what did you get me Neji?" Neji handed him his present. "Instant ramen, awesome! Thanks Neji." "Oh and here's Lee's present," Neji said as he gave him the present. "A poem!? Naruto yelled, "And why is he is a cheerleader costume? No one wants that as a present." He showed everyone the picture and they all looked like they were going to hurl. "Where is Lee anyways?" asked Guy. "Oh, he isn't feeling well," Tenten replied back.

Back at the training field...

Lee was straining and struggling against the ropes that had him tied to a training post. In front of him an old ugly stripper was dancing and bouncing around. "T-this is extremely unyouthful and torturing!" He thought as he screamed for her to "please stop!" Lee didn't know the stripper was deaf. "You want some more, well okay," she said as she moved closer to him. When she took off her bra Lee screamed girlishly and passed out.

Back to Naruto's party...

"Did you hear something Neji?" Naruto asked, Neji shook his head no. "Oh well, let's chow down." Naruto said loudly. The chef handed out the ramen and everyone (even Akamaru) enjoyed the best ramen in town. The end...


End file.
